Seventy first week-Waiting for answers

This week has been a particularly tough week for me. I have done a lot of running around and attending meetings but no real action so far. I have a feeling that something is going to happen soon. It just has to. I am about a week away from paring down further in what I can do. Starting September 1st, I will need to cut my transportation expenses because there is no money coming in for  it. I hate to do it as being able to travel to my favorite libraries to do research has been my safety valve. It's also what's been keeping me sane as I go through this present trial.

If something doesn't come along in the next week or two, I will have to pare down even further...maybe skip a meal or two. Yes it is that desperate...unfortunately. But as most of you know tough choices have to be made when there is no money coming in and little prospect of any coming in soon. For some it means that they are only weeks away from being homeless. Luckily I'm okay here.

I admit that I am waiting for answers...waiting for someone somewhere to take notice of me and offer me a job. I know that's not the way to go. I know that you need to be aggressive in order to get what you want and need. That's not my nature. I am not aggressive, at least I don't think I am.

I heard everyone say that you have to stick your neck out to get noticed any more....the more sensational you are the better chance you have. I can't do that. I don't want my legacy to be that I trampled over others to get that elusive job. I'd hate a job like that. I want something that will utilize my current skill sets while helping others and provide me with enough money to support myself and my family. I don't believe that's too much to ask for, but unfortunately this is no longer the mentality of the work place today. No one wants to help their fellow human being...at least that's the impression I'm getting in the corporate world. When will it stop? I shudder to think of the punishment that will rain down on them on Judgment Day when they have to explain their actions. Maybe I am old fashioned.